From ez040018@dale.ucdavis.eduTue Mar 11 14:18:20 1997
Date: 10 MAR 1997 23:04:56 GMT 
From: Jonathan Fox <ez040018@dale.ucdavis.edu>
Newsgroups: alt.irc, alt.irc.lamers
Subject: How to Annoy People on IRC 

                    Ways to annoy people on IRC


1.  Call channels "rooms."

2.  Write a client that sends a CTCP ERRMSG reply to a CTCP ACTION.

3.  Ask an IRC oper why your DCC doesn't work.

4.  Use mIRC.

5.  Rejoin a channel you were just kicked from and say, "WHO KICKED ME?!??!?"

6.  /nick ILoveBEEF
    /join #india

7.  Type all your happy faces backwards.  (:

8.  Keep msg'ing "Hellooo??" to someone when you know he's lagged.

9.  While you're talking to someone, set yourself away with "brb" and then
    take a four-hour nap.

10. Get on IRC right after you've had sex and brag.

11. Send a /wall to a channel you're not an op on.

12. Write a script that ignores CTCP pings.

13. Invite your friend to channel #masturbate when you know his mother is
    watching.

14. Threaten to sue someone in real life because he banned you.

15. Join a sex channel with an account from a foreign country and say, "Is
    there any girl?"

16. Act like everyone likes you when they don't.

17. Find an op who only knows how to ban by nick and torment him.

18. Cybersex in public.

19. Talk to people only through your bot.

20. Give your bots e1E3t h4Qr n1CkZ but leave your real name as their IRCNAMEs.

21. Say "netsplit" when there's a netsplit.

22. Put "You'd like to know, wouldn't you?" as your IRCNAME.

23. Use a really common nick and tell everyone you're the original.

24. Add all your friends to your Combot at 99 and then make all the commands
    100.

25. Act like you think everyone uses mIRC.

26. Set a topic with a beep in it.

27. Misinterpret sarcasm.

28. DCC chat people you don't know.

29. Pretend you're a bot.

30. Say "here" when someone says "rollcall."

31. Tell people that /bind ^M SELF_INSERT makes you a channel op.

32. Have intense, descriptive, one-sided netsex with a bot.

33. Send CTCP SOUND commands to your friends on Unix shells.

34. When someone pings the channel you are in, msg him and say, "Why did you
    ping me?"

35. Call someone you've never met in real life your "girlfriend," then get
    jealous when other guys msg her.

36. Ask people to ping you instead of pinging them yourself.

37. Join a channel, say "hello?", then leave.

38. Threaten a bot.

39. Say, "rumorf"

40. Give user mode +v to your friends when you don't really know what +v means.


-- 
Jonathan R. Fox                                      School of Medicine
jrfox@ucdavis.edu                       University of California, Davis

       "Welcome to Chinese Restaurant.
        please try your Nice Chinese Food With Chopsticks
        the traditional and typical of Chinese glonous history.
        and cultual."
                                   -- BAMBOO CHOPSTICKS
                                      PRODUCT OF CHINA